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Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Spanx for Nothing: Gift Ideas for the Discriminating Dad

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Oh, Dad. He fed you, clothed you, put a roof over your head, and provided the seed from whence you sprung. Recognition must be paid. This year, you could travel the usual, tired old gift route -- a new Roto-Rooter, a magnum-sized bottle of Sitch by Situation cologne, a discreet pair of Man Spanx -- or you could think outside the box.
To that end, we present two particularly covetable gift ideas for Fathers Day 2K10 -- gifts that smack of luxury, style, and ingenuity.

Maybe your dad is the outdoorsy, thrill-seeking type. No worries: for a mere 5 grand, you can treat him to a first class-trip to the final frontier. Sorta. The Zero Gravity Corporation is offering the chance to dress up and play astronaut -- for real. It's called weightless flight, and, to be frank, it looks sort of awesome (if entirely, obscenely unnecessary). The folks over at Zero G suit you up in a legit flight suit, put you through the same training actual astronauts undergo pre-flight, and then Rocket Man your ass into the stratosphere. Flights take off out of Logan (really?) where a Boeing 727 takes participants on a trip that defies gravity. Which means you float around all weightless inside the plane for a spell, as if you were on Mars. When it's all over, Dad will have joined the likes of (according to Zero G) Joey Fatone, cast members of the "Biggest Loser," and ... Stephen Hawking. So, you know this is legit, and also trendy. Which is always the point. Dads will stagger away with more than just memories to last a lifetime -- your nominal boarding fee also includes a weightless flight certificate of authentication and a Zero G-branded hat!

Alright, so your dad doesn't know his Rolling Stones from his Stone Temple Pilots. Your dad is in touch with his feminine side. He went to see Sex and the City -- both of ‘em -- and he isn't afraid of a little man-scaping. Yet, he's still a man's man, rugged and masculine. What better gift, then, than a trip tailored just for his unique needs? A Boston Brewmance Getaway. The Renaissance Boston Waterfront Hotel has designed a man-trip for the father in your life and all his best bros. Which they refer to as the "ultimate mancation relaxation." Enough said. Dad will chug beer in style, sunning himself poolside, with a package that includes a flight of icy brew, tasty finger foods and unlimited access to the chi-chi hotel's spa and health club. Too cute! Because there is nothing guys like better than sipping tiny cups of beer, nibbling tiny little appetizers while his best buddy enjoys a green tea facial. Right? RIGHT? Enjoy, Dad. And if you drink a few too many flights this weekend, there's always those Man Spanx.


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