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Monday, June 7, 2010

Tom Cruise was unimpressive at the MTV Movie Awards

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Many are saying that Tom Cruise found redemption at the MTV movie awards with his dance routine and willingness to be goofy. Read on to see why other’s find it harder to be impressed.



Ed Helms was dressed as a puffy, white cloud during his performance, while Ken Jeong danced in a tiger bathing-suit, complete with tail. Jeong really went all out with his dance moves, which is how you take something weird from awkward to awesome, btw.

But Les Grossman aka Tom Cruise (in character from Tropic Thunder) didn’t like their performance, so he busted out his own moves with Jennifer Lopez. While Lopez can dance and Cruise was clearly rehearsed, I preferred watching Helms and Jeong. They are more believably funny.

The camera cut to Katie Holmes clapping several times, although you’d be lucky to recognize her with such a gaunt-looking face and insincere smile. And does Cruise think he can pull a Charlize Theron and then be transformed? Everywhere I look, people are saying Cruise is “back”. I don’t think so. Sorry, but once you jump on Oprah’s couch and ruin the life of a Dawson’s Creek alumni I have no mercy for you. But what about you guys, do you feel your faith restored in the Church of Tom Cruise? You know he still worships aliens, right? I can respect any religion, but it’s damn hard to respect one where you look up to aliens as your saviors. A five minute dance number can’t erase that past five years.

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